,
Donna Havens MEd. Psych Counseling
Certified Holistic Health Practitioner
Coach, Consultant, Mentor, Teacher, Author, Speaker
Spirit, Mind and Body Transformation - Love, Longevity and Legacy
What's New October 2024
Dear Clients and Future Clients,
I am writing to let you know about some new developments as I strengthen my vision for and understanding of the work I am doing now and going forward! Please don't hesitate to contact me with any concerns or questions!
First, Some References and Some of My Thoughts
Here is a copy of some references I recently received, that sum up well what I bring to this work, as well as some things I am thinking about and working on, and what matters to me.
"What are Donna's clinical strengths? What I can say is this: Donna combines an extraordinary amount of empathy and imagination with a very analytical mind and an unusual ability to remember details. I don't think I ever met anyone so strong in all those capacities, either during four years at Harvard or in all the years since. I believe that any client who works with Donna will feel that they are really being heard and understood, and will be surprised at how detailed her grasp of their personal story is.
She is someone who is constantly trying to deepen her understanding of what it means to be a well-integrated and adjusted human being and she is committed to helping her clients identify and achieve their goals, to helping them to achieve excellent outcomes.
I'm always amazed when I realize that all of Donna's client relationships since March 2020 have been virtual and not in person. Somehow, she manages a very strong connection with people she has never been in the same room with. I suppose this ability is related to her powerful sense of presence, also seen/felt when she is on stage or when she is speaking to a group. A mutual friend of Donna's and mine, who is a practicing therapist, calls this ability one of Donna's "superpowers."
Donna brings a lot of real life experience to her constantly evolving understanding of the work she is doing. She has raised three remarkable children. She understands in a profound way how narratives shape lives, but she also brings scientific knowledge and method to her practice. Donna doesn't talk about it but she is a member of Mensa and sees connections readily, often before others notice at all. In addition to psychology, couples and family work and conflict resolution, she has studied nutrition and holistic health and has thought a great deal about how physiology affects the psyche, why and how modalities work, and the process of creating healing environments. Donna is always looking for new authors and speakers who can expand her understanding of effective strategies for helping different kinds of clients.
As a professional writer I have found her open to editorial suggestions in her own writing, one of her passions, reflecting her openness and commitment to her own learning and to professional and personal growth. Donna has written books on the healing power of myth, mystery, play, imagination and deep loving connection, and she has published two articles for Mel Bay on self-discovery through music and the joys of working with a luthier on building a custom-made guitar.
I have worked with Donna as a musician on several occasions. I actually met her at a Celtic music session. Having mastered the art of fingerstyle instrumentals and accompaniment, she was learning how to accompany traditional tunes on the guitar, a challenge for most guitarists who did not grow up with this music and challenging style. Most of my performing and recording career has been focused on my songwriting, but I have been playing traditional instrumental tunes since I was a young teenager. Donna picked up this playing style quickly and she has played with me on several occasions, including a show at the Iron Horse. She has always been very easy to work with and has a natural relaxed manner when on stage that her fellow musicians and the audience all enjoy. I didn't realize till I'd known her for several years that she had done a number of solo concerts earlier in her life, she has recorded a CD, and that she has played/performed on other's CD's as well. "
"Any individual, family or couple that gets to work with Donna is in the best of hands. She cares deeply for each one and for the work she does in a way that can only come from her years of experience, her strong empathic and intellectual capacities combined with her continued studying in the fields of psychology, spirituality, mental health and well-being. I highly recommend working with her. It is a life-changing adventure!"
My own thoughts - I have always gone after my dreams and goals with heart and gusto. I mention this in case this is a desire of yours, too, and you would like to work on what is blocking you! My latest projects include a musical collaboration with my daughter, and, after discovering a direct ancestral connection to a founder of Springfield and Longmeadow Massachusetts where I grew up, a book on the importance and value of ancestral identity and healing. My most recent passion in addition to working with my clients and nurturing my relationships with family, friends and loved ones is spending time in nature, nature photography and studying ancient stone mysteries of New England. Professionally I am adding new services - Healing for the Healers, Spiritual Entrepreneurship and Creating Psychological Safety in the Workplace, Maintaining Health in Spirit, Mind and Body By Approaching Life with Curiosity, Vision, Clarity, Authenticity and A Continued Profound Sense of Purpose, and a 12 week class on Healing and Self-Discovery Through the Arts.
Going Forward
For now I am offering hourly sessions for $85 per week, $75 per week with a three month commitment to weekly sessions. Make-ups will be provided with 24 hour or more notice of cancellation. In addition to the weekly session I will offer some email support between sessions and homework assignments that will support your progress.
Please note that I am not calling my work therapy, but "coaching". My work is a healing work, without doubt, but much of what I do is about addressing root causes and building healthy foundations in spirit, mind and body, and is not considered a "medical necessity" that is needed to be covered by insurance. I am not accepting insurance payments for now, nor offering superbills. If I determine that you meet the criteria for a DSM diagnosis of a mental disorder, I will be sure to talk to you about this and refer you out to those services as needed.
I so love working with you all!
Sincerely and with best wishes,
Donna Havens, MEd
[email protected]
What's New - July 2024
What Really Matters and How Do We Really Heal?
What really matters? What really matters to you? What matters to me and to people in general, at different stages of our lives, after a pandemic, when there is so much war in the world, when we are soon to elect our next president here in America? What matters to people around the world? I have been studying this as I have been working as a clinician through the pandemic and the aftermath. What really matters? When we are suffering, what is missing? What do we need? How do we thrive in these times?
How do we really heal? In my work with individuals, couples, families and my new focus on organizations, I have been witness to so many people’s stories, struggles, perspectives and paths forward. I have seen the courage and strength people can access in the most challenging times. I have seen people handling life with grace and compassion and hope as they uncover what is true for them, what really matters, and ways forward that are in alignment with their values and authenticity. This is how we as humans can manage suffering, it is the way of integrity. Our values, what really matters to us, this is our true north. We dig deep and we find our next first step and we find our way forward, with deepest love for ourselves and for others, and for what really matters.
There are certain things that matter to all of us. These are physical health and well-being, stability, safety, love, family, community, making meaning, and leaving a legacy. Foundational to healthy lives is peace in our heart and soul. We only heal physically, emotionally and spiritually when our nervous system is in a state of rest. This has been proven scientifically, and we now know that this is why the “woo-woo” works. We can reset our nervous system with healthy food and drink, good sleep, exercise and movement, time with loved ones, yoga, meditation, physical touch, time in nature, listening to and playing music, laughter, sunlight, and creating things with our own two hands.
Here in America we are struggling to live lives based on what really matters. We numb out with unhealthy food, alcohol, drugs, shopping, the internet. Our work lives don’t often allow for us to live in alignment with our values and in a state of rest and restoration. We claw our way to the top, working so many hours. We are fearful and competitive and as such we are at war with one another. There are some good workplaces, but many are toxic and unhealthy. The excuse for bad behavior is that “it’s business, not personal”, and one is sometimes looked down on for being naïve and foolish if they question this. I am saddened when I see people change their own values and beliefs in order to fit in as they move up the ladder.
It doesn’t have to be this way. Change is possible. Change is necessary if we are to heal. Healing starts with building lives around what really matters.
In 2014 I wrote a book, Luke and Me: The Healing Power of Play, Imagination, Storytelling and Love, and I shared my story of having been arrested in then Communist Yugoslavia and the impact this had on my happy little middle class American world view, and I asked the question, how do we heal the world? I have been seeking answers ever since.
This is how we heal the world. It begins with each one asking ourselves what really matters. Some will say that what really matters is making as much money as possible at whatever cost to others, and acquiring status and possessions at the risk of deep relationships and authentic connection. I believe, however, based on my work with my clients and on interviews with the dying, that when all is said and done most people don’t think that fame and fortune are what truly matters, and I believe that If we dedicate ourselves and commit to a life that reflects back what really matters, and live in alignment with these powerful beliefs and values, each in our own individual way, our decision will impact and ripple out to our families, our workplaces, our communities, our nations, and the world.
The Doomsday Clock might be saying that it’s one minute to midnight. I don’t buy it. Let’s do this! What really matters to you, and how do we really heal?
Let’s dig in. Come, tell your stories and feel seen, known, understood and heard. Find your next first step. Find healing and direction.
Let’s heal ourselves, our families, our workplaces, our communities and the world!
Donna Havens, MEd Psych Counseling
Note - April 2024 -
Four years since the beginning of the pandemic - last week I had a great talk with a client about remembering who and how things were before the pandemic - who we were - and moving beyond processing the pain and losses to refocusing and reclaiming the things we miss that we can reclaim! Clients are asking questions such as how do we reconnect to joy, happiness, a felt sense of safety? How do we regain our physical health and emotional well-being? How do we reconnect deeply to one another? How do we reconnect to the awe and mystery of life? These are my favorite kinds of questions. My clients and I go on the adventure of finding answers - finding some answers that are true for all and answers that are personal and based on my clients' individual challenges and life experiences. We go on a quest to find answers to the questions that lead each one to their life of integration, meaning, purpose, a felt sense of being seen, heard, known, and understood; a life each individual client can look back on with joy, peace and contentment.
Note - May 2023
It's almost the "official" end of the pandemic. I'm not really sure what that means. Three years ago this week a dear friend of mine died of Covid after a month in the hospital alone, on a ventilator, one of 21 friends and loved ones that I have lost since March 2020. Covid is still around. People, family, friends and loved ones, still argue about masks and vaccines, but less frequently and with less emotion. We have been through a collective trauma, one we didn't see coming, and we have experienced it differently and we have come to different conclusions. I am changed, and I am pretty sure that you are, too. We have memories. We have scars. We have coping skills we didn't have before, some good and some not so good. I highly recommend unpacking that! I feel that we can integrate our experiences to become more confident, encouraged, hopeful, stronger in the broken places, older, wiser, and more complete. We can use the lessons we are learning to help us to be healthier in spirit, mind and body. We have more control than we know and this is a very important message at a time when health care and providers can be hard to come by.
I have been working with individuals, couples and families as they have had to navigate significant challenges and loss. Come learn about resilience, uncertainty, trauma, courage and healing. I am ready to process with you what you now carry, and integrate what we now know as we move together towards a better life for you, your loved ones, and collectively, a better world for all.
Do you feel called to more? Do you want to live more vibrantly in all aspects of your being? Are you being called into a deeper and wiser identity, a more authentic you? Do you feel called to make a deeper impact, to help heal our families, our communities and our planet but you don't know where to begin? Would you like to explore better health, a deeper creativity, storytelling, and courage to speak and share who you really are and what you really believe? Do you know that all this matters - that you matter and that we need you?
Health challenges, weight challenges, unexpected turns of events, healing the past, love found and lost and found again, seeking meaning and purpose, leaving a legacy - these are things I have tackled, studied, worked with, things I know deeply. I can help you transform your life. It's important. You are important. You are here, now, on purpose. Be your best you so that you can have your biggest impact.
Certifications/Trainings
Trauma-Informed Care Clinical Advanced Practice/Trauma Responsive Certification, which required training in Motivational Interviewing, Attachment, Regulation and Competency (ARC), Neurobiology and Trauma-Informed Care, The Adverse Childhood Experiences study (ACEs), Adult Survivors of Trauma, Culturally Adapted Trauma, and training in Mindfulness Skills
I have completed Level 1 in Gottman Method Couples Therapy and use Gottman Method Couples Therapy in my work.
I am approved by the Committee for Public Counsel as a Bonding Assessments Provider/Vendor in Child and Family Court
Institute for Integrative Nutrition, SUNY Purchase, Certified Holistic Health Coach; Certified Self-Esteem Elevation Coach for Children
Donna Havens MEd. Psych Counseling
Certified Holistic Health Practitioner
Coach, Consultant, Mentor, Teacher, Author, Speaker
Spirit, Mind and Body Transformation - Love, Longevity and Legacy
What's New October 2024
Dear Clients and Future Clients,
I am writing to let you know about some new developments as I strengthen my vision for and understanding of the work I am doing now and going forward! Please don't hesitate to contact me with any concerns or questions!
First, Some References and Some of My Thoughts
Here is a copy of some references I recently received, that sum up well what I bring to this work, as well as some things I am thinking about and working on, and what matters to me.
"What are Donna's clinical strengths? What I can say is this: Donna combines an extraordinary amount of empathy and imagination with a very analytical mind and an unusual ability to remember details. I don't think I ever met anyone so strong in all those capacities, either during four years at Harvard or in all the years since. I believe that any client who works with Donna will feel that they are really being heard and understood, and will be surprised at how detailed her grasp of their personal story is.
She is someone who is constantly trying to deepen her understanding of what it means to be a well-integrated and adjusted human being and she is committed to helping her clients identify and achieve their goals, to helping them to achieve excellent outcomes.
I'm always amazed when I realize that all of Donna's client relationships since March 2020 have been virtual and not in person. Somehow, she manages a very strong connection with people she has never been in the same room with. I suppose this ability is related to her powerful sense of presence, also seen/felt when she is on stage or when she is speaking to a group. A mutual friend of Donna's and mine, who is a practicing therapist, calls this ability one of Donna's "superpowers."
Donna brings a lot of real life experience to her constantly evolving understanding of the work she is doing. She has raised three remarkable children. She understands in a profound way how narratives shape lives, but she also brings scientific knowledge and method to her practice. Donna doesn't talk about it but she is a member of Mensa and sees connections readily, often before others notice at all. In addition to psychology, couples and family work and conflict resolution, she has studied nutrition and holistic health and has thought a great deal about how physiology affects the psyche, why and how modalities work, and the process of creating healing environments. Donna is always looking for new authors and speakers who can expand her understanding of effective strategies for helping different kinds of clients.
As a professional writer I have found her open to editorial suggestions in her own writing, one of her passions, reflecting her openness and commitment to her own learning and to professional and personal growth. Donna has written books on the healing power of myth, mystery, play, imagination and deep loving connection, and she has published two articles for Mel Bay on self-discovery through music and the joys of working with a luthier on building a custom-made guitar.
I have worked with Donna as a musician on several occasions. I actually met her at a Celtic music session. Having mastered the art of fingerstyle instrumentals and accompaniment, she was learning how to accompany traditional tunes on the guitar, a challenge for most guitarists who did not grow up with this music and challenging style. Most of my performing and recording career has been focused on my songwriting, but I have been playing traditional instrumental tunes since I was a young teenager. Donna picked up this playing style quickly and she has played with me on several occasions, including a show at the Iron Horse. She has always been very easy to work with and has a natural relaxed manner when on stage that her fellow musicians and the audience all enjoy. I didn't realize till I'd known her for several years that she had done a number of solo concerts earlier in her life, she has recorded a CD, and that she has played/performed on other's CD's as well. "
"Any individual, family or couple that gets to work with Donna is in the best of hands. She cares deeply for each one and for the work she does in a way that can only come from her years of experience, her strong empathic and intellectual capacities combined with her continued studying in the fields of psychology, spirituality, mental health and well-being. I highly recommend working with her. It is a life-changing adventure!"
My own thoughts - I have always gone after my dreams and goals with heart and gusto. I mention this in case this is a desire of yours, too, and you would like to work on what is blocking you! My latest projects include a musical collaboration with my daughter, and, after discovering a direct ancestral connection to a founder of Springfield and Longmeadow Massachusetts where I grew up, a book on the importance and value of ancestral identity and healing. My most recent passion in addition to working with my clients and nurturing my relationships with family, friends and loved ones is spending time in nature, nature photography and studying ancient stone mysteries of New England. Professionally I am adding new services - Healing for the Healers, Spiritual Entrepreneurship and Creating Psychological Safety in the Workplace, Maintaining Health in Spirit, Mind and Body By Approaching Life with Curiosity, Vision, Clarity, Authenticity and A Continued Profound Sense of Purpose, and a 12 week class on Healing and Self-Discovery Through the Arts.
Going Forward
For now I am offering hourly sessions for $85 per week, $75 per week with a three month commitment to weekly sessions. Make-ups will be provided with 24 hour or more notice of cancellation. In addition to the weekly session I will offer some email support between sessions and homework assignments that will support your progress.
Please note that I am not calling my work therapy, but "coaching". My work is a healing work, without doubt, but much of what I do is about addressing root causes and building healthy foundations in spirit, mind and body, and is not considered a "medical necessity" that is needed to be covered by insurance. I am not accepting insurance payments for now, nor offering superbills. If I determine that you meet the criteria for a DSM diagnosis of a mental disorder, I will be sure to talk to you about this and refer you out to those services as needed.
I so love working with you all!
Sincerely and with best wishes,
Donna Havens, MEd
[email protected]
What's New - July 2024
What Really Matters and How Do We Really Heal?
What really matters? What really matters to you? What matters to me and to people in general, at different stages of our lives, after a pandemic, when there is so much war in the world, when we are soon to elect our next president here in America? What matters to people around the world? I have been studying this as I have been working as a clinician through the pandemic and the aftermath. What really matters? When we are suffering, what is missing? What do we need? How do we thrive in these times?
How do we really heal? In my work with individuals, couples, families and my new focus on organizations, I have been witness to so many people’s stories, struggles, perspectives and paths forward. I have seen the courage and strength people can access in the most challenging times. I have seen people handling life with grace and compassion and hope as they uncover what is true for them, what really matters, and ways forward that are in alignment with their values and authenticity. This is how we as humans can manage suffering, it is the way of integrity. Our values, what really matters to us, this is our true north. We dig deep and we find our next first step and we find our way forward, with deepest love for ourselves and for others, and for what really matters.
There are certain things that matter to all of us. These are physical health and well-being, stability, safety, love, family, community, making meaning, and leaving a legacy. Foundational to healthy lives is peace in our heart and soul. We only heal physically, emotionally and spiritually when our nervous system is in a state of rest. This has been proven scientifically, and we now know that this is why the “woo-woo” works. We can reset our nervous system with healthy food and drink, good sleep, exercise and movement, time with loved ones, yoga, meditation, physical touch, time in nature, listening to and playing music, laughter, sunlight, and creating things with our own two hands.
Here in America we are struggling to live lives based on what really matters. We numb out with unhealthy food, alcohol, drugs, shopping, the internet. Our work lives don’t often allow for us to live in alignment with our values and in a state of rest and restoration. We claw our way to the top, working so many hours. We are fearful and competitive and as such we are at war with one another. There are some good workplaces, but many are toxic and unhealthy. The excuse for bad behavior is that “it’s business, not personal”, and one is sometimes looked down on for being naïve and foolish if they question this. I am saddened when I see people change their own values and beliefs in order to fit in as they move up the ladder.
It doesn’t have to be this way. Change is possible. Change is necessary if we are to heal. Healing starts with building lives around what really matters.
In 2014 I wrote a book, Luke and Me: The Healing Power of Play, Imagination, Storytelling and Love, and I shared my story of having been arrested in then Communist Yugoslavia and the impact this had on my happy little middle class American world view, and I asked the question, how do we heal the world? I have been seeking answers ever since.
This is how we heal the world. It begins with each one asking ourselves what really matters. Some will say that what really matters is making as much money as possible at whatever cost to others, and acquiring status and possessions at the risk of deep relationships and authentic connection. I believe, however, based on my work with my clients and on interviews with the dying, that when all is said and done most people don’t think that fame and fortune are what truly matters, and I believe that If we dedicate ourselves and commit to a life that reflects back what really matters, and live in alignment with these powerful beliefs and values, each in our own individual way, our decision will impact and ripple out to our families, our workplaces, our communities, our nations, and the world.
The Doomsday Clock might be saying that it’s one minute to midnight. I don’t buy it. Let’s do this! What really matters to you, and how do we really heal?
Let’s dig in. Come, tell your stories and feel seen, known, understood and heard. Find your next first step. Find healing and direction.
Let’s heal ourselves, our families, our workplaces, our communities and the world!
Donna Havens, MEd Psych Counseling
Note - April 2024 -
Four years since the beginning of the pandemic - last week I had a great talk with a client about remembering who and how things were before the pandemic - who we were - and moving beyond processing the pain and losses to refocusing and reclaiming the things we miss that we can reclaim! Clients are asking questions such as how do we reconnect to joy, happiness, a felt sense of safety? How do we regain our physical health and emotional well-being? How do we reconnect deeply to one another? How do we reconnect to the awe and mystery of life? These are my favorite kinds of questions. My clients and I go on the adventure of finding answers - finding some answers that are true for all and answers that are personal and based on my clients' individual challenges and life experiences. We go on a quest to find answers to the questions that lead each one to their life of integration, meaning, purpose, a felt sense of being seen, heard, known, and understood; a life each individual client can look back on with joy, peace and contentment.
Note - May 2023
It's almost the "official" end of the pandemic. I'm not really sure what that means. Three years ago this week a dear friend of mine died of Covid after a month in the hospital alone, on a ventilator, one of 21 friends and loved ones that I have lost since March 2020. Covid is still around. People, family, friends and loved ones, still argue about masks and vaccines, but less frequently and with less emotion. We have been through a collective trauma, one we didn't see coming, and we have experienced it differently and we have come to different conclusions. I am changed, and I am pretty sure that you are, too. We have memories. We have scars. We have coping skills we didn't have before, some good and some not so good. I highly recommend unpacking that! I feel that we can integrate our experiences to become more confident, encouraged, hopeful, stronger in the broken places, older, wiser, and more complete. We can use the lessons we are learning to help us to be healthier in spirit, mind and body. We have more control than we know and this is a very important message at a time when health care and providers can be hard to come by.
I have been working with individuals, couples and families as they have had to navigate significant challenges and loss. Come learn about resilience, uncertainty, trauma, courage and healing. I am ready to process with you what you now carry, and integrate what we now know as we move together towards a better life for you, your loved ones, and collectively, a better world for all.
Do you feel called to more? Do you want to live more vibrantly in all aspects of your being? Are you being called into a deeper and wiser identity, a more authentic you? Do you feel called to make a deeper impact, to help heal our families, our communities and our planet but you don't know where to begin? Would you like to explore better health, a deeper creativity, storytelling, and courage to speak and share who you really are and what you really believe? Do you know that all this matters - that you matter and that we need you?
Health challenges, weight challenges, unexpected turns of events, healing the past, love found and lost and found again, seeking meaning and purpose, leaving a legacy - these are things I have tackled, studied, worked with, things I know deeply. I can help you transform your life. It's important. You are important. You are here, now, on purpose. Be your best you so that you can have your biggest impact.
Certifications/Trainings
Trauma-Informed Care Clinical Advanced Practice/Trauma Responsive Certification, which required training in Motivational Interviewing, Attachment, Regulation and Competency (ARC), Neurobiology and Trauma-Informed Care, The Adverse Childhood Experiences study (ACEs), Adult Survivors of Trauma, Culturally Adapted Trauma, and training in Mindfulness Skills
I have completed Level 1 in Gottman Method Couples Therapy and use Gottman Method Couples Therapy in my work.
I am approved by the Committee for Public Counsel as a Bonding Assessments Provider/Vendor in Child and Family Court
Institute for Integrative Nutrition, SUNY Purchase, Certified Holistic Health Coach; Certified Self-Esteem Elevation Coach for Children
